Maybe this post will be relatable, maybe it’s just me outing myself as a crazy person.

I’ve noticed that I do certain things while being a pedestrian at a 4-way stop that mostly have to do with not fully knowing how to be a normal human being in these situations yet. I would say that I’m just really non-confrontational but one of the things I do completely negates that sentence.

The Zombie Walk. No, I don’t go all extra on The Walking Dead but I do slow down my gait into a slow walk. If I see a car approaching the crosswalk that I’m headed for, I would rather delay my arrival to the road than go through the awkward making eye contact and them letting me pass and sitting there until I’ve finished crossing the street. Cars are much faster than humans [citation needed] and if there isn’t a long line of cars then the situation goes by much more smoothly if they go then I go!

The False Turn. This move stems from the same thought process as the first one. I just want this singular car to just move on through before I have to go across. If I’m way too close to the intersection to pull off slowing down, I have been known to pretend to turn onto the street while they drive through and then switch my intentions and cross it behind them. Is that going to far? I don’t know…

Uncomfortable Eye Contact. Should I be in a situation where I am crossing the street and the driver seems especially anxious to continue on their way – so like right turns where we both technically are allowed to go – I will take the plunge and go ahead crossing the street but I will be making direct eye contact with the driver the whole time. It’s kind of like a “calm down buddy I’ll be a few seconds you don’t have to inch up to me” stare.

That Little RunLastly, whenever I wave to the driver to go first but they wave back at me to go ahead, I’ll probably either speed walk it or put a little run in at the end to get back onto the sidewalk because the whole time I’m crossing I’m just painfully aware of how long I’m taking and they have to just sit through it.

Needless to say, I love traffic lights that tell everyone when they’re allowed to go and remove all the awkward from the situation! What do you guys think, is this relatable at all or am I really overthinking this whole thing?


5 thoughts on “Crosswalk

  1. This is hilarious. Especially since I’m oblivious and will pretty much cross whenever the cars aren’t moving. But I live in a fairly large city and usually there are walk signals.

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